10 Quick Lessons That Can Save Your Family’s Life

10 Quick lessons that will save your life.pdf  (feel free to share)

10 Quick Lessons That Can Save Your Family’s Life
By Coach David Alexander (1LessonSelfDefense.com)

“When you’re in a fight for your life, you better know how to win!”  Coach David Alexander (Self Defense Expert)

Lesson 1:  There are only two rules you need to know for you and your family to survive a violent attack.  Rule #1:  Repeat after me, “My family and I will do whatever it takes to survive.”  Now you say it, “my family and I will do whatever it takes to survive.”  Rule #2:  See Rule #1.

Lesson 2:  Avoid.  You need to avoid places where violent attacks tend to happen.  Pay attention to your surroundings, don’t hang out in bars, don’t get involved in drugs, stay away from the rough parts of town, get home at a decent hour, etc….

Lesson 3:  Escape.  If you and your family can anticipate or see a situation developing that could end up bad, then you need to escape.  Get the hell out of there!

Lesson 4:  Deception.  If an attack is imminent and you and your families lives are in danger; you might need to deceive to escape or gain access to a vital target. Throw some dirt in their eye or throw some change on the ground (try this, and see if the person doesn’t reflexively look down) or say something like “Hey, what’s that behind you?” This might give you a second for you and your family to make a break for it or it might distract your attacker long enough for you to smash a knee into their groin.

Lesson 5:  Neutralize.  If you cannot Avoid, Escape, or Deceive to escape, then you must neutralize the attacker(s) as fast as possible.  When I say neutralize, I mean to take out the brain functions of the attacker(s) which will end the threat.  Keep in mind that the brain is the real weapon of your attacker.

Lesson 6:  Use your tool extenders.  I consider your body and various body parts to be your main “tools”.  Anything that you can pick up or use in order to amplify your main “tools”, or body parts, I refer to as “tool extenders”.  As I mentioned before, the brain is the weapon, everything else is just a “tool” to get the job done.  Quickly get out your tool extender such as a gun, knife or club or an improvised tool extender that might be immediately accessible (brass knuckles, rock, brick, chain, keys, pen, stick, tire iron, etc…) and shoot, smash, plunge or crash it into a vital target of your attacker(s) in order to shut down their “weapon” or brain.  Do this without tipping off your intentions.  You need the element of surprise in order to get in the first strike.  If you wait until your attacker(s) get in the first strike, then you will be dead, and so will your family.  The person that strikes first wins (lives).  Remember, you have done everything to avoid this situation (lessons 1 – 4) and now your only choice is for you and your family to do whatever it takes to survive (see Rule #1).

Lesson 7:  What “Vital Targets” should you strike, smash or stab?  Targets are more important than the technique.  For example, you could literally neutralize an attacker by tripping, falling and landing on their trachea causing them to asphyxiate and die.  It would not take years of practice to develop your trip and fall death dealing trachea smash strike.  The technique does not have to be pretty, just keep going after your attacker(s) vital targets, with your tools, until they are unconscious, incapacitated or dead.  So what targets should you and your family strike, smash or stab (assuming you don’t have a gun or could not get to your gun)?

Men:  Eyes, Trachea (front of neck), Vagus Nerve (side of neck), Back of neck (spine), Groin (including pubic symphysis), Solar Plexus and Liver.
Women:  Eyes, Trachea, Groin
Kids (depending on age, size):  Groin, Eyes (When they strike the groin, it will cause a reflex, like a hand moving off of a hot stove, of the attacker bending over and bringing their eyes within range for your kids to gouge).  Remember Rule #1.

More “targets” can be added with experience and training.  See http://www.1lessonselfdefense.com for more info.  When you’re in a kill or be killed worst case scenario, your kid’s (depending on age and size) need to be trained to help out the family or themselves.  You have probably trained them to fire a gun, why not also train them to end a threat with their hands?

Lesson 8:  How to strike a “Vital Target”?  You need to strike a vital target (Eyes, Throat, Groin, Solar Plexus, etc…) by moving your body weight into your attacker and through a tool (gun, knife, club, improvised tool extender or body part tools such as hammerfists, palm heels, knees, fingers, thumbs, elbows, forearms, shins, boots, etc…) in order to cause an injury to your attacker(s), so you and your family can get away.  Your goal should be to render your attacker(s) unconscious, incapacitated or dead.  Your goal is not to “beat up” your attacker(s), but to end the threat as quickly as possible to get your family home safe.  Do not stop injuring targets until you feel the threat is completely neutralized and you and your family could safely turn your backs on the attacker(s) and get away.

Lesson 9:  Get the hell out of there!  Do not wait for the police to arrive. You could be arrested and say something stupid in the heat of the moment.  Go call an attorney and let your attorney contact the police.  You also don’t want other people to come on the scene, see what is happening and assume (incorrectly) that the people you’re stomping and smashing are the good guys and they need to help them out.  Friends or gang associates of your attacker(s) might show up and want some revenge on the family that took out their buddies.  You might get caught in a riot.

Lesson 10:  Take lessons in a target based self defense/protection system and not a martial art.  Martial arts are way to technical, take way too long to learn and are geared to defend against people from the past (think about it).  Also, over the years a lot of martial arts have been turned into sport based systems.  Some of the old school moves, that might have helped you in a real worst case scenario attack, have been taken out of their program so that people can spar for points and submissions and to train without injuring the other person.  You can’t “Tap Out” in the real world.  Or they will hold back the “good stuff” until you finally reach your black belt.  Do you have time to wait and get a black belt and hope that what you learn will actually work in the real world?  What if you need to survive an attack right now?  What are you going to do?

I hope you enjoyed my first post.  I am not a writer, but do my best to get the information presented in a logical manner.  Be safe, and always remember Rule #1!

“Be polite, be professional, but have a plan to kill everybody you meet”  Maj. Gen. James Mattis

“He who does not punish evil commands it to be done.” Leonardo Di Vinci

Coach David Alexander (Self Defense Expert)

17 comments to 10 Quick Lessons That Can Save Your Family’s Life

  • Son of Liberty

    Good article David… I’m glad you wrote this because I’ve thought for a while that this topic is not well covered in circles like this. It seems there is a lot about firearms and such, but it seems like there is little on self defense in general so this is really practical advice.

  • Coach David

    I agree. Violence can happen anywhere and most people are relying, way to heavily, on getting quick access to their firearm. You should have a firearm, but also make your hands equally lethal. It also seems that there are some U.K. readers on this site, what are they supposed to do? Thanks for reading. Coach David

    • urban sling-bow

      Yes excellent short article.

      I’m over in the UK where weapons of most types are either banned or restricted in some way (weapons of any type are banned in public spaces even if legal in the home). The above is therefore particularly important to people in the UK, or even to those in other countries where public carry weapons are legal but who have no wish to go straight to the ‘lethal stage’ in dealing with a threat by using a firearm, etc.

      I am not a martial artist, or a ‘fighter’ of any description, but having faced many difficult situations over the years I have already subscribed to your rules 1, 2, and 3 above. They are spot on in my opinion.

      Having encountered many violent individuals, and gangs, over the years (in the course of my previous employment, as a voluntary worker, and just when trying to mind my own business), I have found that a prepared ‘mindset’ is all important.

      Where I have not managed to anticipate a problem and simply avoid the situation, showing a potential attacker(s) no fear (body language, verbal communication etc) and then the taking of a defensive and confident posture in anticipation of a physical move by an attacker has fortunately, at least to date (and in the future too, God willing) been all I’ve required to do in order to move to rule 3 – escape.

      Vigilance, anticipation, avoidance, and general ‘Mindset’ is so important. Although I would like to think I am quite capable of protecting myself and my my family from a potential attacker I would rather not have to find out one way or the other. In my opinion the use of a weapon or ‘fancy moves’ are really the very last resort – when all else has failed, backs are against the proverbial wall, and all bets are off.

      Great first post, I’ll look forward to reading some more.

  • Coach David

    “The knife robberies statistic of over 15 thousand attacks (only those reported, many more are not) during 2011 in the UK, shows that thousands of people were robbed at knife-point last year, which is over one thousand per month. It is a disgusting and worrying, yet accurate, depiction of a crime ridden nation which can only be solved through drastic action,”

    urban sling-bow, It sounds like you need to worry about knives not guns. What do you think?

    • urban sling-bow

      Coach David,
      Yes, knife crime is a problem, but not to the extent some of the figures suggest.

      Knife crime in the UK tends to be mainly a ‘youth on youth’ problem, ie a young person robs another young person at knifepoint. These days a lot of kids carry a lot of expensive items, often in full view (ie ipods, phones, cameras, notebook computers, jewellery, etc) in places where they really should not (town centres and city centres at night, in bars, clubs, underpasses, and in areas of high drug crime). They stand out like illuminated beacons for any low-life to home in on.

      I have seen many young kids totally immersed in their own bubbles (texting, listening to music, etc) that they simply do not notice where they are walking, or a potential situation arising, or even realise that they are being followed. They often have no situational awareness.

      Your ‘lesson 2’ above should be something every kid is taught.

      Other knife crime, which is perhaps by far the most common, is youth-gang on youth-gang, or simply ‘angry youth’ on ‘angry youth’. Often this is the result of the usual ‘respect’ and ‘turf’ sort of stuff that is common to gangs and drugged up individuals the world over. I cant see how this will ever really change.

      Fortunatly, it is rare that an ‘ordinary’ person, especially a situationally aware person, would fall victim to a knife crime. Intimadation, threats of physical violence, and actual physical violence such as ‘sucker punching’ or ‘happy slapping’ (with or without subsequent robbing or sexual assault) are far more common than knife crime. Again, avoiding a sucker punch or being gropped can often come back to your ‘lesson 2’ above.

      Organised criminals are different. They may use knives or an intimating weapon such as a sword or machettee, but in my experience they are just as likely to have access to firearms here in the UK as they are in other countries. Contrary to the perception that the UK is a gun free zone, I can assure you that it is only the ordinary person who is completly unarmed – organised criminals in the UK have access to a wide range of hardware. In my previous career I have personally come across firearms ranging from the ubiquitous sawn off shotgun (very common indeed) to 7.62mm assault rifles – and all sorts in between (especially WW1 and WW2 era handguns). Often getting hold of a firearm is not the hard part – its getting ammo (especially for some of the older weapons which turn up).

      Going back to knife crime I was taught a long time ago how to disarm someone holding a knife (or a gun) at armslength (I could not do it now without retraining) but the instructor told me if possible always run from a knife rather than try to take it from someone. Good advice or not? I dont know as fortunately I have not had to make the decision.

  • Coach David

    “knives scare black ops soldiers more than guns”. Yes! Definitely get the hell out of there if you can. You do not want to tangle with a knife if at all possible…but sometimes you do not have a choice. For example; An attacker is already on you holding a knife to your throat, your kid or wife is next to you in a small space and cannot run away. I train people in this situation to disregard the knife (tool) and shut down the weapon (brain). If someone tries some crazy knife disarm (that person has practiced in their lighted and padded “dojo” with a compliant partner in the same exact situation and scenario), then they’re going to be stabbed multiple times and eventually bleed out. But if they were to go straight for the weapon (brain of the attacker), they might get stabbed once, but when their thumbs enter the attacker’s eye sockets and hit the back of his skull, the attacker will forget that he ever had a knife. BTW thanks for the insights of the UK youth and violence, I appreciate it. Coach David

  • Turkeynutz

    Good article Coach. I just hope they listen and learn so when the time comes…

    • Coach David

      The problem is no one actually listens or learns. Sad, but true. My detractors will say that they don’t want to hurt anyone? But ask them if they would shoot someone that was harming them or their family and they would do it. What is the difference in using your hands? I realize it seems more personal, but so is getting killed! Thanks for the comment, Coach David

  • Archangel

    Great lessons Coach. I’ve always been a supporter of avoidance, escape, or jam their eyes into their head.

  • Nice article, and point one shouldn’t be underestimated. The amount of people I’ve personally witnessed ‘freeze’ in a dicey situation is many – sometimes people I really wouldn’t have expected to. I once trained with the Grand Master of Eagle Claw, David – he was a trainer of Jet Li and taught certain people in Hangzhou, China. When he found out my back ground was in Psychology he said something that roughly translates as “kung fu, psychology, same thing” :-)

    The mind is the best weapon of all and my motto is to defo knock them out before they pull something out or their mates arrive.

    I’ve never been in a dicey situation with my g/f yet – who’s pregnant by the way – defo follow rule 2,3, and 4 as much as possible. I’ve heard an old wallet can work for point four too.

    I’ve never had a gun pulled on me, like urban sling-bow above I’m in blighty and it’s not that likely outside the drug-market world. Broken glass, sticks, and knives do occur though and I’ve had a few encounters with quite a number of yobs with such items.

    Things were different then though, I was either on my lonesome or with a male friend and not my pregnant g/f. I used to just think “fuck it, c’mon dickhead” :-) Can’t do that now so it’s religiously following point 2,3, and 4 for me, and if necessary I’ll do whatever I need to. I know I can, because I have memories of doing so.

    Anyway, keep ’em coming.

    Good luck

    • Coach David

      The “weapon” is always the brain. It doesn’t matter what “tool” they have. Yes, stay away, but when you don’t have a choice, you must end the threat. Thanks for commenting. Coach David

  • twisted titan

    great article coach………… really hits home as I have two small ones

    • Coach David

      I used to fight for fun, until I had kids. It sure does change your perspective. Thanks for the comment! Coach David

  • Farmer Dan

    excellent article sir.

  • As competitive as they were I remember countless times they restrained girls for no reason one woman did not want to go to homeless and the employees cody grabbed her wrists and yelled at her then shoved her into the cart, so she hit him after, but it was provoked. Well for me I did what I could I had to place on a display that’s what Dra instructs you tell on other women, say you love the spot, never tell your parents the truth if you mentioned you resented it and informed them anything negative they end your call. If they were real honest to goodness program they would not care what children informed their parents even if it wasn’t good.

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